More Heather

I dont want to forget, but it's driving me crazy to remember.
All day long, she's all that's been on my mind.
I cant breathe, I cant think.
I'm hoping Alex adds me soon, so perhaps I can get her email, because we all know about my OCD induced phone phobia.

Over and over I hear : "That's my magic", "Remembering you", "This is me not kissing you", the silence of the stairs, and breathing. "Queers" and "Do they grow the cows?!". Over and over and I dont ever want them to stop but I dont know what I'd do with myself if they didnt. Every single second, I'm wishing I could talk to her, be with her, have her looking up at me like she did.

But I'm thinking I'm so fickle. Before this I was completely smitten with Becky, and before that was Katie. All crushes, but this is different. This feels different. Two days is all I got, but it feels so much better than months and years with the others. Now no one measures up. The beautiful girls are still beautiful, but no where near her.

I'm trying not to encourage day dreams that come with falling for someone. For the sheer fact of not knowing if I'll ever see her again. For the fact that I have no idea how she feels and I'd feel completely stupid for falling so hard for someone who didnt have feelings for me. But why would I be remembered if there wasnt something there? I wouldnt...





I'm not falling

I'm plummeting...